This was my first blog: Reblog
Further to the devious plot of the HOUSTON CLAN I will continue explaining the selfish, greedy and underhanded actions taken by the adult professional children of Dr. Bob Houston against their father, his wife Angela Houston (my mother) and me.
To summarize the previous post I will say this……two married elderly people had mirror wills that left everything to the surviving partner; as it should be. Then only after the death of both parents the children of Dr. Bob and the children of Angela would get half each to be disseminated equally to each child on both sides.
A power of attorney was given to Louise Fowler for her mother Angela Houston; sounds right to me. And Angela Houston and Dr. James were power of attorneys for Dr. Bob; don’t see any problems with that. Dr. Bob was not c0-attorney for Angela, along with me, because he was not capable of executing any part of the “Fiduciary obligations”. Angela had taken care of ALL the family household issues and bill paying responsibilities; he had no clue or ability to do what was required. The HOUSTON CLAN, which is the 4 adult professional children and their spouses, did not like this arrangement. Of course Dr. James’ nose was put out of joint because now he didn’t have complete and total control as he had before. Dr. James had been power of attorney and executor of the will for both our parents; absolute power. He had an agenda before I came along and unwittingly I battered the bee hive. First and foremost they wanted their inheritance right away that seems to be the bottom line. They didn’t want to wait for my mother to die. This plan would have been executed had I not come back into the picture. When this all came down I believe we all thought Dr. Bob would pass first, who knows how long the old girl would live, right. But that would not have mattered had I not come back home to be with my mother in the last years of her life. They seemed to think that was suspicious. Well it’s perceived as being suspicious when you have an agenda that does not include the supposed evil doer and you want to cover your tracks.
Lets remember that Mrs. Houston paid off Dr. Bob’s debts incurred educating his 4 children giving them a very privileged life (all their life). She paid for 3/4 of their expenses for 3/4 of their 34+ years of marriage. There is more they received in aide so that Dr. James could maintain his elite status living in Oak Bay Victoria. I will elaborate later. It is also useful to know that I on the other hand left home at not quite 14 years old and virtually out of boarding school and in a new country due to psychological and sexual abuse in the home. I was also brought up in a time where the understanding of a learning disability was not acknowledged or understood. Therefore, I was called stupid, lazy, uncooperative etc etc, affecting my self-esteem and confusing me for most of my life. This innocent, shy, pleaser of a child was now left on the streets of Toronto to fend for herself.
NO ONE, ever, came looking for me. NO ONE seemed to care where I was and what I was doing. I wasn’t hiding. I could have been dead for all they knew. It would appear to me NO ONE gave any thought to how this child was going to survive on the streets at age 13/14 years in a new and strange country. I slept under bridges and bushes while the HOUSTON CLAN lay snuggled up in their beds with a silver spoon hanging out of their mouths. I ask you to please look at my picture and ask yourselves what does a child like this do all alone in the world. Well, I recall at approximately age 14 going to my father and asking him for some financial help – he said NO; while he lived a very high life style. I guess he didn’t like me saying no to him. I cried and was panicked and frightened, I was confused, I was alone, therefore, when a young lady asked if I would like to go to an exclusive private men’s club with her, I went. Private men’s clubs were not unknown to me because my father used to take me to the private section of the Zanzibar in Toronto at age 12/13. You can figure out the rest.
I tell you this sad story of my life because I will NOT allow the HOUSTON CLAN to define me. I will own my own narrative but I will not live with their characterization of who I am. I say to them HOW DARE YOU, HOW BLOODY DARE YOU! I was the “Forgotten Child” in the family but I was somehow responsible for that and it made me some kind of criminal capable to just about anything according to the HOUSTON CLAN. I guess I hadn’t gone through enough and they though taking a machete to me (figuratively speaking) was required to take me out. What pompous snobs. Being a Doctor or an Inspector does not preclude them from bad behavour. How sad that they don’t know what it means to forgive, to be grateful for what you have, to love someone despite past pains.
My point is that the HOUSTON CLAN did not respect and honour the choices our elderly parents made. Our parents must have felt that this was a fair and equitable dissemination of their assets upon their death. The HOUSTON CLAN had no right to question their decisions never mind take action to change their wishes without the knowledge of our parents. SHAME ON YOU ALL! It is a shock to me that there are lawyers such as Michael O’Connor QC and Sarah Klinger who are willing play a role in the annihilation of these two elderly people, and me by NOT providing one shed of evidence to support the HOUSTON CLAN’s accusations. I suppose it speaks to their integrity or lack thereof.
The quotes I will give you are from court documents and are in bold italics.
“Although the Plaintiff (Angela Houston) and the Deceased (Dr. Bob) agreed to not change their wills and to protect the family unit, the Defendant (Dr. James) James Houston was not satisfied”.
“The Defendant (Dr. James) by his own admission, saw at least three attorneys in a five month period in order to protect his own interests”. I think it is important to understand that Dr. James had “fiduciary obligations” under the Canadian Law; it is my understanding and wholehearted belief he violated these legal obligations but has never been called on it, I wonder why? I will share with you later how he lectured me about “fiduciary obligations” while breaking them himself. You can decide if you agree.
“What is more, their attitude created conflict with the Plaintiff (Angela – their step-mother)“.
“Every time they raised issues about the finances, it was an implicit attack on the Plaintiff (Angela) who took care of the family finances for over 34 years”. This arrangement was made with the approval, and in fact request, of Dr. Bob for he was not good with handling money and Angela was. Reminding you he was in debt when they married. Also, remember she was clearly savvy enough to have the money to pay (in part) for their education. Also, Angela was of sound mind until a couple of days before her self-imposed death.
“When the Defendant (Dr. James) and his siblings took steps to take care of their father without consulting the Plaintiff, it was an attack on her care-taking abilities”. For their entire marriage Angela took care of her husband with extraordinary devotion and love. We should all be so lucky, I wasn’t. Dr. Bob wanted for nothing thanks to her.
“Shellagh Russell (HOUSTON CLAN member) “SHELLAGH THE PERFECT CARE-GIVER”, the women who did not care-give her own mother, “went so far as to say that she thought the Plaintiff (Angela) was not doing a good job. There was no joint plan, just steps taken to bypass the Plaintiff and treat her as an obstacle to be ignored”. This certainly did not engender a nice fuzzy feeling for my mother and hurt her terribly.
“The Defendants (HOUSTON CLAN) did not consider what they were doing. They seemed confident that they were doing the right thing, so that any complaint must be the fault of Louise Fowler”. Couldn’t possibly be the almighty Doctor, or perhaps the Inspector, or the little nurse etc etc……..
“Louise Fowler became the excuse that allowed everything”. What a tactic. They were so sure of their position that they couldn’t even take responsibility for their own actions they had to blame someone else.
“It allowed Shellagh Russell to drop by unannounced”. With the attempt to control my mother, Angela.
“It allowed for any disagreements to be someone else’s fault”. Not me! “I’m a doctor you know” as told to me by Dr. James.
“There is no evidence that Louise Fowler did anything untoward or behind the Plaintiff’s back” To-day we can look back in hindsight and it is easy to see now how everything they accused me of, or potentially doing ‘I DID NOT DO’ — BUT THEY DID!
IF THERE IS ANY EVIDENCE TO THE CONTRARY, WHERE IS IT? With a cop in the HOUSTON CLAN, Inspector Clarke Russell, how is it possible that he of all people couldn’t find any illegal conduct on my part? Despite the fact they accused me of it many times. Lorene (HOUSTON CLAN) rambled off a whole litany of crimes I have apparently committed. How sad that this mentally ill woman was manipulated by Dr. James. She is lucky that I didn’t sue her for slander.
“The Plaintiff (Angela) gave her daughter a power of attorney similar to the one the Deceased gave the Defendant (Dr. James). That the Plaintiff (Angela) treated her daughter in a manner similar to the way the Deceased (Dr. Bob) treated him (Dr. James) and was quite worrying to the Defendant (Dr. James).
“It allowed for overreaction to the movement of accounts from Fundex to CIBC.” A choice made solely by Angela and Dr. Bob, somehow this must be Louise’s fault. I think Curby Klaibert who was supposed to be financial planner for Dr. Bob and Angela, but really was working for Dr. James undercover, had some invested interest in all this. Only saying, my opinion. More on this issue later and Curby Klaibert and his shenanigans with Dr. James, the puppet master.
“It is to be noted that the larger of the two accounts was moved in kind. In other words, a major fund was not liquidated”.
“Any evidence to the contrary must be regarded only as after the fact rationalization”.
“More so, it was agreed by all that neither the Defendant (Dr James) nor his siblings took any effort to look at the CIBC documents, if they were truly concerned”.
“The Deceased (Dr. Bob) was mentally competent to the date of his death”. Admitted by Dr. James and clan.
“The Deceased (Dr. Bob) could have severed the tenancy himself, or drafted a new will, but chose not to.” They certainly harassed him enough. “There is no independent proof that the Deceased wanted to change the state of title of the Property”. I witnessed actions taken by Dr. Bob that would strongly indicate he did NOT want to change his will or follow the actions of his children.
“Quite the opposite, both the Defendant James Houston’s letter to David Church (yet another lawyer) and the affidavit filed by Shellagh Russell make the Deceased’s intentions clear: he wanted himself and his wife to live out the rest of their days in peace”. Well these two fragile people most certainly did not have that, thanks to the HOUSTON CLAN. Their father died a confused and emotionally distraught man. It cost Mrs. Houston hundreds of thousands of dollars (in the neighborhood of a million dollars) to get back what belonged to her in the first place; to which she paid for in the most part. I put that down to (1) abuse of power and elder abuse on the part of the HOUSTON CLAN. (2) Incompetent lawyering on the part of Michael O’Connor who facilitated the HOUSTON CLAN’s devious plot. (3) The 1st lawyer of Dr. Bob and Angela, Jack Adelaar who I have reason to believe was cavorting with the HOUSTON CLAN, to be elaborated later (4) Along with gaps in the law that allowed for further abuse sanctioned by the courts. She lost all the cases taken against the HOUSTON CLAN. You say how could that happen; good question.
“There is no evidence that instructions regarding the severance were ever given to the Defendant James Houston. There is no documentary evidence of ratification after the severance took place”.
“Further, there is no evidence that the Deceased understood that the severance of the tenancy after his statement on April 1st, 2009 would expose his wife to litigation”. If Dr. Bob did understand what they were saying HE WOULD NEVER EVER HAVE AGREED! It is shocking to me that they understood their father so little. But then again what is so surprising, everything we see is a reflection of ourselves. We see what we want to see to suit our own agendas. No respect for this great man. Dr. Bob cried one day while I massaged his sore feet. Something Bob never did even in front of the wife he loved so much. He said to me, “I don’t understand what my children are doing”.
“Shellagh Russell admitted that litigation was never discussed with the Deceased. However, the potential for litigation was clearly known to the Defendants (HOUSTON CLAN)”.
“It is submitted that James Houston filed the Form A transfer for the purpose of severing the tenancy and enabling himself and his siblings to commence a Wills Variation action; facilitated by the lawyer Michael O’Connor LLP. It is not likely that the Deceased (Dr. Bob) wished his family to enter into litigation. There was no benefit to the Deceased to have the tenancy severed during his lifetime”.
“Further, a Wills Variation action has been commenced”.
“There is no other purpose or benefit to any other part in severance of the tenancy”. No other benefit for anyone but the rich HOUSTON CLAN and their arrogance and inflated egos.
In later blogs I will tell you –
1. What they have said about me in legal documents.
2. More background on Curby Klaibert, Robb Budd, Michael O’Conner, Jack Adelaar, Inspector Clarke Russell, and Shellagh, Diana and George Shirling, plus Tony and Lorene Houston and Dr. James and Louise Houston (not me).
3. What friends of the HOUSTON CLAN have said about them.
4. What my brother Tony Fowler contributed to this ugly mess.
……and much more
This is a reblog
DO NO HARM?
How do you measure harm? So much of us is hidden behind a smile.
Who can you trust to NOT willfully, deliberately and consciously do something that will change your life forever.
I propose, sadly, NO ONE!
In the quotes and italic print are statements made in a court of law. I will offer inserts of my perception.
This is about THE HOUSTON CLAN, my mother Mrs. Angela Houston and her husband Dr. (Bob) George F. Houston.
What they did to me will come later, their collateral damage, when they found they couldn’t get what they wanted from harassing our parents.
“On September 4, 2003 my late husband and I purchased a condominium at 206-2277 Oak Bay Avenue, Victoria, BC….”
“On July 22, 2005 my late husband executed a Power of Attorney naming myself (Angela Houston) and his son, James Gregg Houston from a previous marriage jointly and separately as his attorneys……”
“Subsequent to the aforesaid execution of the Power of Attorney, on March 12, 2008 my late husband revised his Power of Attorney and I became the sole attorney with my late husband’s son James Gregg Houston (Dr. James) becoming my husband’s attorney should I be unable or unwilling to act as his Attorney…..” Mrs. Houston does not recall why her husband decided to make this change; but in reflection there are suppositions we can now make. Later blogs will address this.
“My late husband’s son, James Gregg Houston has since December 5, 2008 attempted to change the intent of his late father’s (prior to Dr. Bob’s death) will by asking your affiant (Dr. Bob and Angela Houston) to sever the joint tenancy on our residence…… ”
“James Gregg Houston, initiated a letter from a Solicitor, David A. Humphries.” David Humphries drafted a letter to Dr. Bob and Mrs. Angela Houston, requesting an amendment to Bob’s will. In part, the letter said,
“…..I wish to clarify that the main two assets of both of you are the condo held in joint tenancy and the securities portfolio, also held in joint tenancy. What joint tenancy means is that when the first of you pass away the survivor ends up with the entire interest in the condo and the portfolio. Three steps would be taken: was David Humphries suggestion by Dr. James to Dr. Bob and Angela. ” 1. Dr. Bob Houston would sell his half to himself for a dollar (or Mrs. Houston) This servers the joint tenancy. Now the condo is still registered in both names but now both of you are no longer “joint tenants”. You are what is called “tenants in common”. Now what happens is that on the death of, for example, Mrs. Houston, her half no longer passes automatically to Dr. (Bob) Houston as the survivor. Now her half passes to her estate and therefore passes to the beneficiaries in her Will. Therefore, regardless of who died first, one half would go to one side of the family and half to the other side. 2. Basically the same for the portfolio. 3. Write a new will.”
Mrs. Angela Houston, after 34 years of marriage, is being asked to forego her spousal rights should her husband die first so that his 4 adult professional children can have their inheritance right away. Since it seemed clear that Dr. Bob would likely pass first they were scrambling to get their share upfront with no regards for their step-mother who had done everything for their father and them. This would deprive Mrs. Houston her own money. When they married Angela paid off all Dr. (Bob) George F. Houston’s debts incurred as a result of paying for the education of his children prior to their getting married. She paid out of the money she brought into the marriage 3/4 of the expenses for 3/4 of their marriage.
“My late husband and I never discussed changing the intent of our wills prior to his death from liver cancer from which he died on May 8, 2009.”
“I am shocked and deeply hurt by the actions of James Gregg Houston….”
“My late husband made a will, I, in turn, made a similar will (Mirror Wills) to that of my husband in which the residue was to be split between our two families.”
“……I do remember the suggestion (made by David Humphries for Dr. James) of how we should change our wills. And I don’t think we even replied to it because Bob and I spoke about it and we were very happy with our first wills. We couldn’t see any point in changing it. We didn’t want to change it….. We figured it was just up to us to say what we wanted to do.
“Did you understand what (Dr. James) James was trying to do? “No” (said by Angela Houston.)
Now, Dr. James tried ambushing Dr. Bob and Angela into going to yet another lawyer to get them to change their wills. That didn’t work for they didn’t want to. Dr. James and Shelagh took Dr. Bob for tea and tried talking him into betraying his wife. This is what they built their case on. They said Dr. Bob agreed to their proposal. They have never produced one shred of evidence that indicated this was the case. Dr. Bob could have written something on a table napkin and signed it in front of the restaurant owner (friend) as a witness; they did not do that. David Humphries office was just upstairs from the restaurant but they didn’t call him down to officiate this transaction, why? Because Dr. Bob Houston adored his wife. Dr. Bob did NOT agree to this (please see my 1st post) Bob new that his wife had paid for most everything over the years and this man of character would never ever have done what his children wanted in this regard. It is too bad his children had so little respect for their father they would ask him to betray his beloved wife. Then later lie saying he did while producing NOTHING.
The HOUSTON CLAN which is the 4 adult professional children and their spouses harassed my mother and Dr. Bob to such an extent Dr. Bob’s and Angela’s lawyer had to threaten an “injunction” if they didn’t stop this abuse.
When they could NOT get these 2 old fragile people to cooperated with their agenda to deprive the other of their spousal rights they tried another tactic.
“After much tooing and froing about the issues raised by Dr. James through Mr. Humphries it was agreed that matters would rest as they were and sent a letter dated January 29, 2009“
“April 14, 2009 appears to have been an important date in the egregious conduct of Dr. James towards his father and his wife.” James Gregg Houston filed the first Power of Attorney in the Victoria Land Title Office under FB258952. He did not advise his father or his wife of this action.
“On April 22, 2009, unbeknowns to Dr. Bob and his wife (Angela) James Gregg Houston filed a Form A – Freehold Transfer in the Victoria Land Title Office under No. FB261090 severing the joint tenancy in the property and creating a tenancy in common.”
“My late husband went into the hospital on April 27, 2009 and was then transfered to the hospice within a week from his hospitalization. My late husband died.”
“A few days before my late husband death James Gregg Houston using the first Power of Attorney attempted to remove his father from the hospice. The use of the first Power of Attorney made little if any sense to me at the time until I realized in hindsight the significance of that attempted action given the use of the first Power of Attorney at the Victoria Land Title Office some days earlier.”
“Subsequent to my late husband’s death I attended at the Victoria Land Title Office to delete my late husband’s name from the title to the family residence and was advised by a clerk that the joint tenancy had been severed by James Gregg Houston on April 22, 2009 less than 3 weeks before my late husband’s death without consultation with your affiant (Angela Houston) and using a prior Power Of Attorney……”
At hearing this my mother, Mrs. Angela Houston, collapsed and cried until she was spent. She was almost 89 at the time.
This, sadly, is only the beginning.
My reentry into my mother’s life was a special day in my narrative.
I had to forgive first; not just her but myself. What I learnt on this journey to understanding was long and hard. When I came to terms with the reality of human nature, none of us are perfect. I believe we do better when we know better. She didn’t learn what she needed to make good decisions in the raising of her child. She grew and learnt as she moved through life too.
I am so grateful we both moved past the damage we had experienced earlier in life and came to share an amazingly kind, loving and gentle life together; despite those who would have liked to destroy us and didn’t trust the real bond of a mother and daughter. Love you mum! I feel such gratitude for you. Rest in peace.
Some people think life is just a game of chess!
If it is I don’t play very well.
My brain is very simple; I don’t sit and calculate my moves. I come from the heart. I move through life in a more organic way. You can’t play chess from that mindset. Maybe that is why life has been so tricky for me. I actually always thought I would like to learn to play; I think it’s good for the brain. Perhaps it’s because I have a learning disability and words & sentences don’t always make sense to me. Life isn’t linear for me; my lenses into life is often times foggy and confused. I am smart but it’s more intuitive and picture oriented. It doesn’t make me bad, stupid, lazy and ornery but I see the world inside out. Maybe that’s why I don’t always understand why other people do what they do.
I have written, and will continue to write, on my ‘pages’ section about my mother’s background and mine. That may help in the understanding of why we made the decisions we did.
My mother and I went through some years of estrangement. In 2005 after much soul-searching and personal work on myself I contacted my mother via letters. We wrote back and forth for about 2 years. We then decided it was time to see each other again.
I know we don’t like saying “what if?. But I do wonder had I thought of the reunion between my mother and me as being a game of chess; being ready for the next move, perhaps things would have turned out differently.
How was I to know that what I actually did when I got off the Harbour Air flight from Vancouver to Victoria to see my mother was in fact batting the beehive. The Houston beehive. A family of people who seemed to already be calculating their moves before I even knew to brace myself.
If those crafty chess players rule the world I am in big trouble – oh yeah that’s right I am. I am heartbroken and my brain is tired of trying to figure out the next move.
A “very” Unfair Playing Field
The dictionary defines, in part, to Speak Up as “speak up for truth and justice, to speak loudly and distinctly.” My father used to yell at me “Louise, speak up!”. Until, he didn’t like what I had to say, so he would yell, “Louise, be quiet! I did for a very long time; I hid for years and years in shame.
I will endeavor to Speak Up in a way that is forceful and clear. This is a complicated story that has many layers and dimensions.
This case of HOUSTON versus HOUSTON is what has brought me out of the shadows and my private, quiet world. I verified all my web sites by way of saying “I am solidly here in my truth”. Rather like the swearing-in in a court of law to “tell the truth and nothing but the truth”.
MY MOTIVES & INTENTIONS
1. To represent and advocate for my mother, Mrs. Angela M. C. Houston. Her adult professional step-children took away her spousal rights and set up a domino effect of heartache and despair. They stripped her of her dignity, her good memories and respect for these wolves in sheep’s clothing. They shamed and humiliated her. I will also speak to the degradation of their own father by maintaining the lies they presented to the courts.
2. To represent and advocate for myself Louise A. Fowler. The Houston’s ravaged my life. What they have done is like a subliminal sound track – you don’t hear it all the time but it’s always there. I feel raped by them. To be silent is to be enslaved. I won’t let them get away with it anymore. You are only as sick as your secrets and I won’t allow them to make me sick anymore. I do not, and will not, allow them to define me and tell my narrative into perpetuity. It’s not about revenge but about fair-play,equal time and accountability.
3. To speak to the imbalance and abuse of the Canadian Legal System. People like the Houston clan were allowed to make their case without evidence of what they proposed as being the truth. This is what I call abuse of power. I will challenge the system and it’s ruling.
This was first blogged about a year ago.
This is about a POWER OF ATTORNEY
and an “ACT OF HUBRIS”
I will tell my story because…..this could happen to you!
Interwoven into this “Greek Tragedy” are two women, a mother and daughter, who were naively and wistfully happy to be reunited after a time of separation; to then take a blow that changed the trajectory of our lives. A confused and stunned fragile man torn between a rock and a hard place created by his adult children. And four adult children who didn’t like the arrangements made by our parents upon their infirmity and death. They took action to have it changed. And enter years of legal wrangling in this case of HOUSTON v. HOUSTON.
To achieve the adult Houston’s endgame they had to discredit me, Louise Fowler. Both parties in this case were represented by lawyers. I, the focus of this case from the beginning, had no one to legally represent and shield me from the distortions, lies and the willful deliberate evisceration and mischaracterization of who I am, to achieve an end I don’t understand.
The Houston adult children’s account of my life, and who I am, was heard in The Supreme Court of British Columbia. It has been recorded and documented into perpetuity.
I will set the record straight in the weeks and months to come.
This is about a mother, a gentle soul who was a hurt, damaged and vulnerable woman throughout her life from neglect and abuse; with the ‘coup de grace’ in the last years of her life. Actions taken by her step-children, and the fallout, hurt this woman so deeply she ultimately took her own life. She died on February 5, 2013 at 92 years old with the daughter Louise, who loved her, by her side.
My mother Angela Houston met her husband Bob Houston while he was in Vancouver for a tennis tournament at the Vancouver Lawn Tennis Club in approximately 1974. In their first conversation, they told me, he said, ” I am separated, would you go out with me”. She said, “not until after you are divorced”. By chance several months later she met him while he was visiting from Victoria again, he said, “I am divorced now, will you go out with me”. He drove her to Harrison Hot Springs for dinner. They never looked back. They married in 1976 and resided in Victoria where he had his medical practice.
She embraced his four children. She helped pay for their education, giving them the careers they have today. Along with helping her husband financially out of the red after he had over-extended himself during the years before they met. She gave her life to this family. To then be betrayed and hurt beyond hurt, many years later, by this step family of children she had loved for so long. She never harmed any of them.
To achieve their end she was forced into being witness to the degradation and shaming of me, her daughter Louise, because they couldn’t have exactly what they wanted – me to be gone. They attempted to deprive this woman of the love of her own child.
All the mothers out there just imagine having to sit back and watch the verbal and recorded persecution of your child, and not be able to do anything? Over time the pain of this drove her to take her own life. The actions of the Houston children forced my mother into the deep introspective work of coming to terms with past hurts and abuse that she had avoided all her life. It was not reasonable or compassionate to expect this well-meaning and uneducated woman to go into the deep and dark recesses of past pains at such an elderly age.
This is about a daughter who was bonded with her mother as a child. Then, after several years of estrangement, we first saw each other again as I got off the Harbour Air flight from Vancouver to Victoria. We bonded again instantly. The past hurts evaporated in that moment.
She had a beautiful smile on her face on that lovely September day in 2007. We were so happy to see each other. As a lead-up to this reunion we had corresponded for about 2 years. Time and age had helped us heal and return to each other after this separation. This falling-out was fraught with the pain of an abusive, disconnected and dysfunctional family long ago. We were meant to be together but trauma and circumstances got in the way. It never occurred to us that this pain would be used against us in an attempt to rip us apart and deprive her of her spousal rights.
I was shattered by the Houston children and clan not being interested in getting to know me when it was offered to them, to the degree to which it would have been in the best interest of all concerned. When I asked them to come together in a friendly meeting to build a bridge to understanding these adult professionals whined about not wanting to waste their time, their father implored them to come. During these few short hours there was a hostile atmosphere in the room. One Houston clan member impatiently said during this get-together, “is it over yet, can we go home now”. This was their level of commitment in creating an agreeable situation that could have prevented the hell that was to come.
This is about an old and lovely gentle gentleman who wrote a Power of Attorney and mirror Wills with his beloved wife Angela of over 34 years.
Angela was “the love of his life” as he told us all. His wife liked to tell people as she beamed from ear to ear, “he never ever said an unkind word to me”. Revealing the heart of this man. It was well-known in the community that Bob adored his wife, to the envy of many.
This private and dignified man cried, yes I mean cried, one afternoon while I massaged his sore and aching feet, he then said, “I don’t understand what my children are doing. It is no ones’ business what my wife and I do with our P/A and Wills.” His first priority was his wife not his adult privileged children. Dr. Houston was a Doctor in Malta during World War 11. He was an honorable and principled man. He knew it was his obligation, and also his willful desire, to provide for his wife her spousal rights should he pass first, he did. No one had a say, or had the right to an opinion, about our parents private affairs and be privy to why they made the decisions they did. I expected and accepted that without question; it would seem his children did not. The legal documents tell the story as it unfolded; unfortunately with only their perspective. (I will attach links to some of these documents in due course)
This is about Dr. Houston’s children, who had their own agenda about what our elderly parents should write in these most sacrosanct and private of documents.
Our esteemed law did not honour Dr. Bob Houston’s Power of Attorney; this allowed the Houston clan to step in taking over Mrs. Houston’s property without her knowledge and permission. Since I don’t understand how or why this happened it is difficult for me to explain it to you. Legal advise did not enlighten Mrs.Houston or myself in this regard. Or perhaps we were given some explaination but made no sense to us. I believe the gravitas of these adult children and their positions in life gave them immediate credibility and access to do anything they wanted and to be heard in a court of law and be trusted with it.
Mrs. Houston was not able to attend her husbands funeral because of the actions taken by the Houston clan she was in so much distress. She found out what they had done to her a couple of days after her husband died. She collapsed in heart-break. It was told to us by several people who attended Bob’s funeral that some members of the Houston clan were saying Mrs. Houston was not of sound mind. This was disputed by several Doctors, saying this was certainly not the case, she was as sharp as a tack.
They loved their father but the actions they took against his wife, and me, was not justified or validated. And it most definitely and unequivocally did not demonstrate love and respect for this wonderful man. This man, along with his wife, gave them everything. Gratitude was what should have been on their agendas.
They had the opportunity to take this hatred they had for me in a different direction, they chose not to. In my opinion they had controlled Mrs. and Dr. Houston for so long they felt they were loosing their grip and made manifest their own worst fears as a reflection of their own dysfunction. This is what I call a ‘self fulfilling prophesy’, “A false definition of the situation evoking a new behavior which makes the originally false conception come true.” The problem with this is 3 people, Mrs. & Dr. Houston and myself, paid a very hefty price on all levels.
This raging storm of hatred and superiority took Mrs. & Dr. Houston, and myself completely by surprise. We had no idea this tempest was barreling down on us, resulting in seven years of court case after court case. We were intent on reacquainting ourselves and learning about each other. We were filled with love, forgiveness and gratitude; sounds so silly now. Whatever thoughts we initially had of acceptance and support from the Houston children and clan went quickly out the window while blaming ourselves for trusting that they were good and decent people. We had no idea they had so much hatred in their hearts for someone they didn’t even know. The court documents are case in point. I am of the opinion their reactionary, intolerant and supercilious attitude is what drove them to destroy all of us. Mrs. & Dr. Houston left this world with broken hearts and I am left a broken person.
This is about our Canadian System of Justice. As a basic principle of the law we are all ‘presumed innocent until proven guilty’. But what if you are not on trial? Rather you are being used and exploited under the umbrella of the law by those who have an agenda to get rid of what they perceive to be their ‘phantom’ obstacle. In a case to which you do not have a voice or right to defend yourself. In legal terms you are not on trial. But, rather a scapegoat and victim of a system that will allow people to deliberately and willfully vilify and defame someone else. They made up or extrapolated from situations that may or may not have happened 20-30 years ago in my mother’s and my life. Incidents they were not even involved in.
I was always under the belief that a court case rises or falls on the evidence. I unwisely thought that truth and proof go hand in hand when engaging with the law. When one side has no evidence to support their accusations and the person being blamed can’t defend herself, what do you do? At first you trust the law wont allow this to happen; to become so disillusioned you end up taking your owe life as my mother did. I always thought you can’t accuse someone of a crime they haven’t committed just because you think they may. We all know what it feels like to be helpless and hopeless in some way or another but when inaccuracies are recorded in a court of law, with only one sides interpretation of the truth, what would you do to correct this injustice? Justice could not, and did not, serve Mrs. and Dr. Houston. It flies in the face of common sense and humanity.
I worry for all the many elderly people out there who could have everything taken from them by greedy family and be left with nothing; no dignity, no money and no peace of mind. I call this “elder abuse”.
This is about working through the emotional mutilation of me.
The shaming of me has almost taken me out. Slogging through the mortification and finding myself on the edge of despair. I watched, helpless, my mother be torn between the love of me and her step-children. Watching my mother be so happy on the one hand to be back together with me and on the other hand be in the depth of depression from the betrayal by the Houston clan. I did everything in my power to care for her but no one can ever fill a soul that has been crushed.
As I go along with this blog and figure out what goes where, perhaps, I will be able to contemplate and then articulate how this all started in the first place, reaching such a horrible end. Making logic out of the illogical, and meaning out of the mean-spirited.
“I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. I will not refuse to do something I can do.” as said by Helen Keller. Ms. Keller overcame the adversity of being blind, deaf and mute to become one of the 20th Century’s leading humanitarians and political activists. If she could speak up so can I.
I, Louise Fowler, will take my power back and speak up against those who wish to discredit, abuse, and silence those of us who don’t carry the trust of others given by job titles and financial means.
My wings have been sheared, my breath is shallow and labored, my eyes don’t want see and my ears can’t hear anymore cruelty, my voice has been shushed, my body is atrophying, my traumatized mind is shutting down from the shock of such callous duplicity, and my heart is throbbing in pain dear reader, I ask for your attention because I would like to be heard but also…
……..this could happen to you!